Saturday, March 19, 2011

Found.


Bittersweet day. I knew someday that this would come. After much heavy contemplating, praying, wondering, worrying, asking and questioning I have decided to start my job as a Full Time Mommy. The last couple weeks have just tore me up. I LOVE my job as a designer, it's a passion, I will carry with me forever. And when I say passion, I eat.sleep.breath.think. design ALL THE TIME, my mind never seems to stop. Creating and making spaces beautiful, seeing clients surroundings become something that they dreamed of become a reality is what I live for. Like I said-A passion, and something I WILL return to!


My girls-My sweet goose gals, friends for a lifetime. I can sincerely say I love each one of them so much! They are my second family and I have had such a great time. Not a lot of people can say the LOVED every single person they worked with & LOVED doing their job, but I can. I can.

These Ladies are each individually so extremely talented, amazing and wonderful. I learned so much from each of them. I love to laugh, and I laughed every single day at work. Love you girls, I will miss working with you beyond measure. Thank you so much for being who you are.


It's funny, I have played this tug-of-war in my head...


Love my job-crazy to let it go for now-want to be there for my boys-I can't leave, built this career for years and I am going to give it up just like that?-This is who I am and what I have worked so hard for-it's what I live for....and on and on. so SO HARD!

This is one of the hardest decisions I have had to make. I think to myself I am totally nuts & What am I doing???!! But then I see my beautiful children. Brayden blowing kisses to me through the window, looking at Greyson's big beautiful eyes and just staring at him thinking I don't want to miss a moment. Being a Mom is such a blessing & an opportunity to focus fully on my boys.

This is a life changing decision, completely different then what I am used to. I have ALWAYS worked, it makes me feel accomplished, BUT who's to say being a Mom is not being accomplished? I am sure it will be difficult but I can't second guess my decision. At the end of the day I am just grateful. My life has slowed down, I am SO used to going 100 miles an hour and LOVED it!! But now, Mommy comes first. Total lifestyle change.

Along the way I have FOUND out a few things about myself.


~FOUND...I can set a goal and achieve it and at times exceed it!

Knowledge. Learned new skills and put them to use.

I can be a daymaker.

Friends to last a lifetime-My Goose Gals

Hardwork pays off.

Focus,discipline, and responsibility.

I could conquer fears of "I can't do it"

I can!

Beautiful furniture and accessories at a killer price(kicking myself..agh,will miss that)

Moments of joy

It's ok to cry at work :)

Unpacking new product is like Christmas morning!

My obsession of glass jars.

Stress can be a good thing.

The pleasure of seeing a perfect room.

Unbelievable Customer Service Skills (I don't handle poor service well now)

Celebrating Groundhogs Day,"Smoke Breaks", and the way of the beaver :)

LAUGHTER!

Friday's will ALWAYS be "floor day" to me.

I love fabric-everything about it.

I can lift and carry downstairs A LOT of furniture :)

I love to draft, it's soothing.


~BUT, most of all I FOUND myself.

Never lost, always found something great...

ALL my love to the BG and cheers to Mommyhood!


8 comments:

Chana and Andrew Alder said...

Stacy, that post made me cry. You put my same feelings about working at the BG into words. That place and you girls will always be in my heart. I am so excited for you to be a full time Mommy. I know you will put everything into it and your children will forever be grateful. YEAH FOR MOMMYHOOD!

..{{bliss in the city}}.. said...

Oh, Stace. I'm not sure you will ever know how much you will be missed. Bittersweet it is. You are such a joy to be around and to work with. One of the most fun, inspiring, creative, hard working, and talented women I have ever known. You have taught me so much...personally and professionally. I will truly miss just being around you three times a week!
I'm so sad for us but could not be happier for you and your sweet boys. We will have to celebrate new adventures soon...I will bring the Martinelli's :)
Love you girl.

Steph said...

I am so very excited for you! I was right where you are at just months ago. it is hard! but your boys are so worth what you are leaving!! I am sure when the day comes...your girls will bring you back with open arms!! Loves Stace...good luck in your new found adventure!!!

ryanjess said...

Oh Stacy of course your post brought tears to my eyes. I know just exactly how you feel leaving the BG...I will always remember how my heart broke the last time I walked out that big beautiful black door. I also remember the feeling of knowing I could now be a full time Mommy to my sweet child and that was the most amazing thing. You will LOVE it and at times you will think you might just go crazy...but when will we ever get these days back? Enjoy every moment and know that you will always be a wonderfully talented designer! I am so excited for this new chapter in your life! Much love!!!

Ali said...

I can understand the dilemma. I think it is great that you have had a career you have loved and one that will take you back with open arms when you are ready. Good luck and enjoy being an accomplished mommy!

Sheri said...

Once again you have made me cry...Motherhood is so amazing. Something you will never regret focusing on fully. I can only imagine how hard this decision was for you. You are such an amazingly talented person. I can't wait to see all the fun things you do and create with your children!

leslie said...

Stacy I love you to BITS! What will we do without you? Robo freight unpacker and master accessorizer all done in 4 inch heels. Tears, real tears!

Unknown said...

Really...?? It isnt a bad dream? I just keep thinking u will be back, makes me feel better! U are amazing all around dinamic! So many customers ask when u will be back and are sad when we break the news. On a happy note I am so happy for you and your family, what a blessing to be able to enjoy every min. Of them growing up! Love ya!